The Dave Green Zone

I don’t normally have an addictive personality. This week; however, I feel like I am falling hard for the siren song of the lovely lady sushi. I have eaten sushi for lunch twice this week, and I feel powerless to stop. I’ve always enjoyed sushi, but I was only a light user (special occasions mostly). Now, though, I live and work right down the street from a great sushi bar (Mr. Sushi in Addison), so getting take-out sushi is as easy as grabbing a burger from a drive-though. Unfortunately though, while sushi might be a lot better for my health than a big mac, it could potentially be a drain on my wallet. I am pretty sure that tuna is more expensive per pound (or kilo) than heroin.

So, yes folks, I will probably end up selling all of my possessions for raw fish and rice, but in the end, I think it will be worth it. In case you don’t believe me, I’ve attached a picture of the “rainbow roll” I ate today. How could I say no to a thing of beauty like that?

As you know probably know, today is pi day (March 14, 3/14, 3.14…). Oddly enough, when I drove by the gas station earlier, the price of gas was three dollars and fourteen cents. Was that just an eerie coincidence or is there some kind of greater pi conspiracy?

A few months ago, I bought like a million refrigerator magnets from Ikea (they were really cheap) and I was worried that I’d never find a use for them. I mean, aside from a Thai take-out menu and a Christmas card with a picture of some cats, what else would I need magnets on the fridge for? It turns out PLENTY, because when you think out of the box, the sky is the limit (so far sky=2). For example:

With my hectic schedule and love for sleeping in, I often forget to bring things with me when I go out in the morning. Magnetism to the rescue!

Let me explain: What I’ve done is attach a Netflix envelope to my door using two magnets. Apparently my door contains some kind of magical alloy that will allow refrigerator magnets to stick to it. It is almost as if my door was made out of a refrigerator. (P.S. I just realized that MAGnet and MAGic start out the same, as does MAGazine. Crazy world, huh?)

Ok, I am really proud of this next one; though, I am a little hesitant to post it (I am considering having it patented). You see, another problem I have is that I can never find a pen when I need one, especially when I need to write a grocery list! I got to thinking that it would be really nice if I had some way to have a pen handy when I am thinking about groceries I need. My first thought was to tape my pen cup to the fridge, but then every time I would sit at my desk, I would wonder where all my pens were. My next idea was to move my refrigerator next to the desk where I keep my pen cup. Well, that was an ok solution for a couple months, but then I had a stroke of genius. As I was sitting in my study, daydreaming about what it would be like to race a single beam of light (as I do every Sunday), I had a great idea! I rushed to my laboratory where I drew up some blue prints and created a computer model. Once I had figured out the logistics of it, it was really quite simple (for me). I painstakingly “jimmied” (technical term) the magnet part off a refrigerator magnet and the used a space-age-polymer-adhesive (laymen’s term: packing tape) to splice the magnetiudal traits of the magnet with the DNA of the pen. Yes my friends, I created a hybrid. I made a MAGNETIC PEN….BEHOLD!

I don’t expect very many of you to understand the burden I bear with the creation of something so beautiful, but I promise not to forget you when I am cashing in my one way ticket to easy street.

Dave

Today, when I was shredding old documents with my new paper shredder, I found the instructions for my old shredder. I shredded them.